Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. - Matt 11:28

Honestly, I really miss my Sunway life...where I have a lovely society there. I miss central gathering and cell group badly...I am now in Indonesia, undergoing such a stagnant life...without any spiritual activities except Sunday mass..I feel something empty in my heart...may be some of you experience the same thing..but I do not know how to describe it further...Today (3rd December 2009) I want to share a bit about today's Gospel....

Actually few weeks left since I read my daily Gospel, I don't know why but I just don't read it for a while though I am not busy here. My brain and my thinking only full of worries, yaa...I worry bout so many things...feel so much problem happen lately and make me far from God..I think...feel so emo, lonely, sad and empty. I worried bout my future, my relationship, my new chapter of life, my family, my surroundings.......All that things just cause me headache, give me so much pressure as problems everywhere...and I am alone here, I don't have friends to share and everyone also got his or her own doing.

But..last night, I went to bed quite early, around 9PM, I already jumped on my fluffy bed and when I wanted to turn off the light, I saw my daily Gospel book, my heart like ask me to open it...I grab it and start flip the pages till 3rd Dec....and here it is today's Gospel Mat 7:21,24-27 (I do not need to type the Gospel as I believe most of you have read it before starting your day).
What comes and really knock my brain is the reflection stated in my daily Gospel:

"Possibly we have watched a child, who is afraid of the water, jump off the side of the pool into the arms of a loving parent. What causes that child to jump? It is trust in the parent. Why does the child trust the parent? The parent has shown, through love, that he or she will not let anything bad happen to the child. We should have that child-like faith in God. It is not a blind, leave-your-brain-at-the-door type of trust or faith. God does not want us to check our brains at the door. He has given us plenty of proof, not only of His existence, but also of the truth of His word.
Do we trust God with the big things, like our eternal home, but not trust Him in the little things, like our jobs and finances? We must trust God in the little things as well as the big things. Do we believe that God cares enough about us to look after those things well? God has so much of His love for us, that is only reasonable to trust that He will take care of the little things in our lives"

After I read the reflection, I am stunt for a while...my tears drop one by one....I never experienced of flipping Bible and find a correct verse or something like that like those people who shares during the central gathering, but last night...after a while I live so called "far from God" without any spiritual life, after a while my brain full of worries, sadness and disappointment of myself.....I feel God just remind me that I do not need to worry so much..just trust Him....and all will be alright....

and at that time, I smiled, I put back my daily Gospel book, I turn off my light and pray my daily prayer before I sleep....in my prayer, I thank God that He remind me tonight and He brings me back, He take out all my worries, pressure and burdens,..I feel so happy and release....and I slept.......so peacefully and release....

And Jason Loo shares...

My brothers and sisters in Christ,

I want to share with you two parts of my life that has been life changing. Nothing more, just two parts.

The first started back in 2004. It was a bad year for me. I had a hard time coping with college, the people and the work that came with it. The change was so drastic for me that before I could stand up to what it had to offer, I fell again and again. I desperately needed help, and by the grace of the Lord, my cousin Richard and good friend Aaron were there to lift me back on my two feet.

This was when Richard introduced me to Lifeline. I had a chance to meet new people and at the same time, find my faith among them. Truth be told, I was brought up a Catholic not really knowing what it truly meant till the day I joined Lifeline. I’ve learnt so much from scripture and in those who keep to their faith that, it has been a journey and an experience unlike any other. For this, I am thankful to many who have nurtured me along the way, your guidance has been nothing but incredible and I thank you for that. Being a realist, I find it difficult at times to hold on to a faith that clashes with our free will to choose. But time and time again, I have realised that the Lord indeed listens to our prayers if we have the time to set aside part of our lives for Him.

The second has to do with loss. I lost someone close to me in 2005, and it was the single most terrifying moment I had to go through. She had a great future ahead of her, yet life had to take its course too early before I could say my goodbyes. Four years on, I still do not understand why the Lord had to take her away, but I have taken it as an important lesson in life. Rest assured I take comfort in knowing that she has gone to a better place, somewhere I hope that I could go to when my time is up.

Before I end, let me share with you a passage from scripture:

“We can be confident that He will listen to us whenever we ask Him for anything in line with His will. And if we know He is listening when we make our requests, we can be sure that He will give us what we ask for.”
1 John 5:14-15

Have faith in the Lord and with the power of prayer, we can be sure He will be there to listen.

He’s Not That Into You Vs. Christian Courtship

Some of us have left Malayan waters and will only be back next year. It's going to be a little bit quiet this time round. But it's okay, we'll bounce back when we open Lifeline again to a whole brand new year in January 2010!

And for some of us, have left for good. :( We really hope that you have taken back something from Lifeline and continue to spread the love of God everywhere you go. Be witnesses of Christ to the people around you. "You will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you and you will be my witnesses - Acts 1:8"

If you are shy to talk to people about God, here's an avenue of where you can express it. Write to me your testimony of how Jesus has moved in your life. Here's a blog set up by Carmel especially to share His love with others. The blog is maintained by Carmel and Andre. If you are not sure what to write, here's a link for a simple guideline. They have some interesting articles as well, and I would like to highlight the "He's Not That Into You vs Christian Courtship" which I thought was pretty insightful.

"The ultimate purpose of dating is marriage"

My first encounter with or, uhmn, how I know about Christian courtship was about 3-4 years ago. I was infatuated with a friend who is a man of God (I can sense his head growing as large as a watermelon). I can’t remember how it went in detail, but I think I was asking him about his view on dating. He said the most shocking and horrifying thing! He said (I can still remember it word by word), “the ultimate purpose of dating is marriage.” I was still wild back then and haven’t experience conversion, so I cursed (silently of course). I thought, ‘wut da *beep*. Dating should be fun! Why be serious about it’. Later on I found out that dating IS serious, but can be fun as well.

Anyways, the guy was right. The ultimate and the only purpose of dating is marriage. So, no more ‘I like you, you like me, let’s go out and we’ll see where this relationship goes.’ NO! Harsh, I know. But, don’t you think dating is such a waste of time if we think that way? Don’t you think we will be spared from confusion, insecurities and not to mention heartaches, disappointments, and emptiness due to the lack of vision of the future and/ or failure of the relationship. Sure, most people we know got married after starting a relationship like this. But, have you ever counted how many times they have experience failed relationships before it?

Christian courtship, like the secular dating, starts with attraction. It may be a one or both sided attraction. Afterwards, discernment comes in. In a very simple explanation, Discernment is a process of internal search where we seek God’s will to determine the best decision. It involves a lot of prayer, meditation, reading God’s word, sharing about it with a trusted friend in faith and pray together, and most of all, being aware of the presence of the Holy Spirit and listen to His voice in with a surrendering heart. God, in His mysterious and intimate ways, will tell us His will.

Ah, you may say that I’m a nut case, but what is foolish to the world is pleasing to God (cf. 1 Corinthians 1 : 27). I tried it out last year. I was interested in a friend of mine because he showed true and sincere love for God and His Church. My kind of guy, I tell you. So I decided to discern about him. During discernment, I continue being friends with him. I tried to know him in a more personal level. There was no flirting whatsoever (so different to the bad ‘ol days). We shared about a lot of things, testify about God love, pray together, pray for each other should one of us need God’s strength. Days went by and feelings grew, however it didn’t grow towards the direction that I wanted. My love for him as a brother in Christ got stronger whereas my infatuation didn’t develop into love for a man. There was nothing wrong with him (or with myself). He was perfectly human and I accepted his flaws. But, in my heart, he was my brother and wouldn’t be more than that. Then I felt God had answered my prayer. I accepted this outcome even though I was a bit disappointed. Honestly, I wanted it to work so badly ‘cause I haven’t been in a relationship in a loooong long time. I was kindda desperate but I had no regrets. I thanked God for the feelings, the process and the outcome. I knew it was the best for the both of us. When the guy told me he fell for a girl (a lovely young woman, I must say), I was delighted although I felt a pang of jealousy (okay, I was VERY jealous). But, I continued being there for him as a sister in Christ. So, this is how I was assured that Christian courtship can work!

That’s about pre-courtship. How about during courtship? During courtship, it’s crucial to put Jesus Christ as the center of the relationship. Not the girl. Not the boy. Not me. Jesus alone. With Jesus at the centre, the problem of co-dependency is eliminated as each person is solely responsible for his/ her happiness and the source of his/ her happiness is Christ alone. Then, there’s sexual purity. A boundary is needed when it comes to physical expression of our feelings. We may say a kiss is just a kiss, but a kiss may weaken our will and strengthen the desire of our flesh. Another important thing is Communication. People get to know each other in a deep and personal level through communication. We’ll find out about each other’s strength & weakness, dreams & fear, vision& mission for the future, priorities, interests, etc, through communication. Some may be acceptable, some may not. Then, with constant prayers God will inform us, in His mysterious and unique way, whether the relationship should continue to the next step – Marriage. Even if a couple decides to not continue with the relationship, by God’s grace, they will not feel overly heartbroken about it. Beautiful isn’t it? I hope I’ll experience this in His time.

"My grace is enough for you; my great strength is revealed in weakness"

My Mission Trip Experience To Sabah
By Crisabel T. Tiu, Lifeline STM

When I heard that Potter and Clay program was having a mission trip to Sabah, I was really excited. I was excited because it was my hometown, the experience I could learn, the people we’ll be meeting and I had this feeling of satisfaction of finally being able to do something good for others and for the redemption of my soul!! Harrharr… Anyway beforehand, Anne Yong and I went out for short briefing on the mission trip, Stacie was able to join bit later, and while we were having lunch at a restaurant, we bumped into Sandy and she joined us in our discussion where Anne asked her to help translate some prayers etc. into malay and following that, she mentioned to Stacie and I that going for missions we have to be open to whom God sends and especially what God wants to give or do in ourselves. I understood what she said but took it lightly and subconsciously thought that there’s nothing much I need to receive, I was keen on my ability to give and help out.

During most of the days in mission trip though I really enjoyed it and had fun, sometimes I would seem ok or happy on the outside but deep inside I felt terribly depressed and heavy, it really brought my whole being down and I felt anger and rejection in my heart. I felt lonely because of the struggle I had to go through alone, feeling no one could understand what I was going through. I asked God again and again why I was feeling this way, for Him to take it away and was really disappointed and ashamed of the weaknesses in me that really surfaced to my knowledge during the trip. Before going for the mission trip, we gathered together for briefing and prayer, as we took turns to pray in a circle, I closed my eyes and saw a shadow-defined heart shape with light seeming to radiate from behind, along the prayers I felt warmth on my forehead and tears couldn't help but flow. I didn’t really understand why the reaction for it was only normal prayers we were having.

During the trip, memories also eventually resurfaced which brought a sense of regret of what could have been done but wasn’t, occasions I didn’t appreciate and hurtful memories. Along the trip I felt useless for not being able to give much and at some point of these feelings bundled up together which gave a lot of pain in my heart I tried to suppress which was really torturing emotionally and spiritually for me. After a while I realised that even before the trip I was already feeling burdened inside firstly because of certain hurts from situations in my family, relationships and other little things along my life that built up feelings of rejection, envy and hurt. In the Divine Office prayers we did with the villagers and with much reflection, it struck me that God was trying to tell me that there was much I was lacking, that inside I still needed a lot of work and healing. His words seemed so alive to me, coming to my sense what Living Word was all about, He didn’t have to talk to me in that booming voice I wanted to hear but He spoke so gently through the Divine Office, Divine Mercy prayers and ultimately through the mass we attended. I noted specially the Gospel on that day, 2 Corinthians12:7-10….Lest I become proud after so many extraordinary revelations, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a true messenger of Satan, 3 times I prayed to the Lord that it leave me, but He answered, “My grace is enough for you; my great strength is revealed in weakness.”…..So I rejoice when I suffer infirmities, humiliations…persecution: all for Christ! For when I am weak, then I am strong. Receiving The Eucharist truly gave me so much peace and joy knowing that He’s always there for me, that my tears couldn’t stop flowing. I felt so renewed.

I was also caught up in my pride subconsciously thinking that I was more worthy in doing God’s work when instead I needed to have humility to be able to admit these weaknesses and I needed to receive help, healing and His graces before I can be able to serve in love. It’s true that no one can give what he does not have. These were the things I was ignorant towards and that I had to fully surrender, He brought it to my attention all what I was oblivious towards. It reminded me that it has been a while I’ve been praying for God to change my heart, called to mind the heart I saw in the beginning, suddenly it made sense to me, in His great love and mercy, He heard my prayers and wanted to change my heart and His shining rays wanting to bring what is hidden to light and thus being able to surrender what’s unknown for cleansing. I’m truly amazed by how much He wants to give us but what we often are unaware of, how much He wants to speak to us but often we are so insensitive towards. There are many weaknesses and struggles faced and I pray that always I can always change to become a better person, if not more Christ-like even in sorrow and hardships, to be able to receive and give humbly.

GOD ALWAYS LISTENS, COMMUNICATES, AND ANSWERS PRAYERS!!

Yuliana Halim herewith share her testimony at the greatness of our Lord. :D

In the past week, I’ve been working part time at a place nearby St Ignatius Church. At first, I was glad that I can spend time at church after working hours but it never happened until the last day because there was always something on when I want to go to church.

Recently I feel frustrated about my future but beforehand I really praised God that I can graduate on time. Reason being, I’m now jobless and not knowing where I should belong to. I started complaining how tiresome it was and it’s starting to take a toll on me.

So on the last day of work, 5th August 2009 I decided to go to church. However I was late for Mass. I felt sad but because I really needed time to be alone to talk to God in His house, I decided to pray at the Grotto, venting my frustrations at Mother Mary about my fears, confusion and desperation. After 10 minutes of prayer, everyone was coming out from Mass and I moved inside. As I walked in, I saw a woman kneeling in front of the Blessed Sacrament. At first I thought there was a confession session going on because I saw her with a man talking seriously. As I started to pray, a girl’s scream emanated the entire hall. I looked for the source of scream and found the woman and man I saw earlier was actually praying for the girl which was being possessed. I felt scared and stopped praying for myself instead I started to pray for her. It took some time for the bad spirit to come out. The scariest part is when the girl could suddenly scream so loud and shout “Shut up”. I can’t speak in tongues or sing the Holy Spirit song so I just kept on praying Our Father, Hail Mary and Glory Be constantly. And at the same time asking God why He kept the girl suffering when all the while I knew He was there but just not helping her straightaway. After a while, the girl finally was able to calm down and stood up straight. They were praising God because the demon had come out. I felt good and excited from afar because I somehow participated in “helping” exorcising the evil spirit from an unknown person.

It was time to go home so I walked to Kelana Jaya LRT station all the time thinking and reflecting. I felt all my prayers were answered. Incidentally, I remembered the night before as I was reading the daily reading which was about a woman asking God to help her daughter who has been possessed. God rejected at first but because of her great faith, God was moved. When I read that, I asked myself why God refused to help her the first time she asked. I kept wondering and fell asleep. In witnessing what just happened, I felt God was saying that He did not reject to help the woman, instead wanted to see how great a faith you have in Him. I realized a few things and would like to share are:

1. Whenever I feel God didn’t hear my frustrations about my future, what He was trying to say is, “Woman, why do you have such little faith and doubt me. I have prepared a great future for you and would bring you no harm as your Heavenly Father.” In the same instance as the Bible reading, He asks us to constantly have Faith in Him which also ties in with the possessed girl at church. Although it took some time to get the demon out, I felt that God wanted us to pray to Him and have Faith in Him that He will cure her.
2. In the end, I ended up praying for someone else instead of praying for myself. It’s like a reminder, “Hey Yuli, your problem is nothing compared to someone else who has a bigger problem and needs your intercession.”
3. He is present everywhere and always listens to our prayer. On the way back home, I praised God for that day and while waiting for the bus I said a simple prayer. From afar I saw a bus coming, and ended my prayer saying that if God really hear all my prayer then let that bus be my bus and He did it. That really was my bus. I really do feel the joy that words cannot describe. Don’t take it as a test from God but instead knowing that His presence is everywhere.

Last but not least, He hears you, answers your prayers and has counted every tear that drops from you.

Amen.

MIssion 101 - They are back and ready to rock the house!

So you guys have been following their journey throughout the past week and I'm sure you'd be anxious to hear what they have to say. And since this is the first time or rather in a very long time mission trip, it would be a great exposure as they come together in fellowship to share testimonies and exchanges of laughter!

We're heading over to St. Francis Xavier's Church along Jalan Gasing, PJ this Friday (17th July 2009). The "Missionary Experience" will be held at the Gonzaga Youth Ministry (GYM) at 8.00pm (to end approximately at 10.. It's going to be fun because Revolutionary Youth Ministry (RYM) & Junior Youth Ministry from SIC and Lifeteen SFX will also be there to come listen! It's almost like a district gathering but not really. Great time to mix and mingle around with our brothers and sisters in Christ!

Just give your CG Leaders a twinkle if you're interested to go!

*p/s: there is no central gathering or bible study this friday.

Mission 101 - Day 5

Sorry guys, the update is slightly lagging. Must be the "time-zone" in Sabah. The pace there is way slower than KL. :p

They had a debriefing guided by Sr. Imelda which was awesome! They shared about how God spoke to each one of them in their experience throughout the mission trip. They gave their individual feedback on areas to improve in the program in future. They left Tuaran for Martin's parents' house to stay, wash clothes and rest. Evening came, they met up with the KK Lifeline crowd where Alex shared about Saints while Crisabel, Jennifer and Stacie gave testimonies. The session was Spirit filled which called for supper after that :p

Yuli shares, "I believe miracles will always happens and even can beyond our imaginantions."

Just Yuli being her smily self

I would like to share about one of my experience with Jesus.

I remembered when last semesters, all my hozmates which also my best fren from the first time since I was in Malaysia left me to further study. To be honest, at the first place there's feeling of released because I just feel too bonded while I was with them.

At first week they left me, I spend my holiday with doing internship and therefore feeling of being alone is disappear. However, the first thing start to worries me when the sem start after my break finished. Then, everday I keep worries about everything as now I doing everything alone, things like: lunch, dinner, frens to study, to share, etc. I feel unsecured, uncertain, sadness, all d worries keeps annoyed me.

Then, one day I went to leader's outreach. In one sections, we have to take 1 paper filling with bible's verse. I get verse," Jesus is the same from the past, now and future."
I am started to think and believe that God give me this situations doesn't mean He leaves me but He sure have others purpose.

Yuli at the Potter and Clay retreat in Port Dickson

From that so on, I learned about how blessfull to have people surrounding me in every minutes. So, I changed my prayer to say thankfull everyday instead of asking giving me frens immediately. I realised that is just so ego and foolish to do that.Thus, I changed my pray to God said that I trusted Him and have faith in Him that he will give the best for me.
Now, I asking God for always give me guidance and lightening my way to suits in His way.

From that, I slowly feel peace in day to day. Now, I believe we had to put our faith in God, because when we worry too much it's just wasting time and energy. So, everything that seems misserable in our life better to only pray, hope and do our best and be humble in our prayer. As it is written in Jer 29:11. I believe miracles will always happens and even can beyond our imaginantions.

Mission 101 - Day 3

Yesterday, they had fellowship at Kampung Logub in the morning. Some went hiking in the woods with some of the youths who accompanied them the whole trip. The rest of them stayed back with the host family and shared a bit about pro-life.

In the afternoon, they travelled to Kampung Tambulaong and met up with teens and youth alike. They hung out with them fishing and played ball. Evening came and they had a pot bless with host families and youths. Again, they had testimonies but from the local youths instead. Nevertheless, we had Jennifer shared about Lifeline. Since Stacie had graced us with her awesome "Forgiveness" talk not too long ago, she also shared it with them. Great day.